Wednesday, September 18, 2013

The Interview

And now, it’s Lunicycle Questions and Answers, where we here at the blog answer questions sent in by our loyal reader. 

Q:  Don’t you mean readers?

A:  No.  Next question please.

Q:  So you completed your 15 miles ride today.  What was the hardest thing about it?  The wind?  The hills?

A:  The chili.

Q:  Excuse me?

A:  The hardest thing about the ride was the chili I had for lunch today.  You'd think I would know better after that experience several years ago on a club ride, but, no.

Q:   Do you want to tell us about that experience?

A:  No.  Move on. 

Q:  We hear you had a dog encounter on this ride.  Care to tell us about that?

A:  Oh, yes.  About two and a half miles of road, a couple of little hills on it and a screaming wind that just couldn’t quite make up its mind.  It’s a crosswind.  No, it’s a headwind.  No, it’s a little of both.  I don’t know what you call it…

Q:  Maria?

A:  Really?  That's your idea of a joke?  Anyway, as I’m pulling into this wind and going up a long shallow hill, I hear a dog barking at me.  It sounds like a little dog, and it’s some distance away, so I ignore it.  Then I realize it’s getting closer.  I glance over and I see this long little ball of brown fur running across the yard shouting insults at me and apparently expressing a desire to see the color of my insides, and I smile because I know that little dog isn’t going to catch me, even if I am going uphill into a headwind.  The dog hits the road behind me and just opens up a run I could not believe.  That little guy looked like his legs were only about three inches long, but he could sprint at over 17 mph.  I thought for a second that he actually was going to catch me, but I distance him in the end.  Never underestimate the little fellow.

Q:  Are you talking about you or the dog?

A:  Oh, ha-ha.

Q:  So, iPod or no iPod?

A:  Oh, a controversial question.  No iPod.

Q:  What do you have against music?

A:  Nothing.  I love music.  What do you have against riding?

Q:  I love riding.

A:  So why would you want to distract yourself from the ride with music?

Q:  Um…I’m asking the questions here.

A:  Oh, sorry.  Carry on.

Q:  So, having gotten your lazy backside off of the couch and back onto two wheels, and, let me tell you, it took you long enough.  I mean, if I were you…

A:  You are me. 

Q:  Well, yes, I know that.  When I say “if I were you” I don’t mean that I’m not you, I’m just saying figuratively that, even though I am you, if I were you…I would…um…

A:  Confused yourself, didn’t you?

Q:  Yeah.  Sorry.

A:  Aren’t you supposed to be asking questions?             

Q:  Well, yes, that was sort of the point.

A:  Well, why don’t you ask one, then?

Q: you think of another question?

A:  Oh, say goodnight, Gracie.

Q:  Goodnight.

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